Posted in Personal development

Massacre of an assessment. 

So I study, I’m quite proud that I am in progress with a bachelor of business, normally but today not so much. I have managed to put work before something else (I fixed the food and fitness issue) again.  I know focus and commitment to my work is important but I just can’t seem to find the balance for my other activities which mean so much to me. I have failed to complete one assignment which will mean failed subject and for the other one I’ve failed to produce work that is acceptable (because it was rushed and I’m bad at the subject so it needed more of my attention) That means a fail for both subjects and me another 3 months away from achieving my goal. Plus I am going to need to just do one subject at a time if I’m going to get achieve the results I am accustomed to.  

Feeling a bit sorry for myself tonight, by also so tired from another massive work day that I can’t possibly concentrate on statistics assessment to fix my work. 

I am however already in plan and rectify mode reviewing what I need to do to restructure life and get a better outcome next time without annihilating anything that matters to me.  Review study load, review social calendar to ensure compromise, review time management at work and effective delegation!!! Keep focused on becoming a store manager without letting my other goals go.  I got this,  I will do better next time.  I will smash this subject in my do over! 

On a brighter note, I have found solace at the end of my day with my happy Sunday tradition which will give me a great start to the week ahead and perhaps some success. 

Posted in Personal development

Happy Birthday Nan 

We started this morning with a walk,  I wasn’t feeling up to a workout today so we call that active rest..  

It’s ANZAC day and my nans birthday (also my step daughters) and my mum had convinced me that we needed to go see my man with her and Denny for her Birthday after all she is 88 so make the effort before it’s too late.  😕 

So despite my morning study, mid-day BBQ with friends and afternoon of work I had planned, I don’t like changing my very tightly scheduled plans,  we decided she was right and we best make the effort.  So post our walk, a quick shower, some very quick catch ups with chores, work etc and then off to mums for coffee before driving out to see nan.  

Well poor nan I think the 2 1/2 hrs of madness that followed will have her sleep well tonight.  The 4 of us are quite ahh. Quick  with the harsh remarks and (we think) witty feedback and laugh, oh my we do have a good laugh at each other’s expense, today especially at nans expense.  It was a great day we had good food (good not good for you) , green tea and loads of laughter, I think poor nan was a bit overwhelmed at times but hey she had some good wicked comebacks of her own which just seemed to come from nowhere so she did alright.  

Really glad we went and I managed to keep my afternoon of work in tact which made me feel like I still achieved something, but more importantly I put family first and it really made for a great day.  I am very glad I did and I’m sure nan appreciated it very much especially after she recovers from all that crazy in a few short hours, I’m sure she will think well, that was fun. 😂 

Posted in Personal development

Bit of an update 

On the 9th of April I posted my weekend of realisation and I thought I’d give a little update for a few weeks later.  

I am feeling good,  I feel like I have control of my own world again,  I am focused, motivated and basically happy. 

 I have control over my exercise routine this is week 3 of making my workouts a priority and I am very proud of that.  I was doing them before but now I’m doing them with attitude. 

I am regaining my control over my food choices, for too long I would just eat and now I am eating with purpose and intent.  I don’t have my meal planning quite on track but I am eating regular good food and tracking what I consume which highlights my opportunities. 

With these 2 key areas of my life back under my control,  my clothes feel better on me (I ditched the fat pants this week finally) my body feels more settled and less upset and my mind is more alert and I am more confident. I can really feel the changes.  So now it’s about being consistent and staying true to me. 

I also made a huge decision which was quite significant, I spoke to my line manager about my career choices,  I am letting go to some extent, my project management career goal which seems essentially unachievable, I am still applying and still trying to find ways to drive me forward but I have accepted it isn’t an overnight option for me.   I have put myself forward for career progression in store to store management and as soon as I did, so much hatred and anger lifted from my shoulders.

  It was as if making a decision and having the support of my managers gave me my career back,  Or my choices in my career back, like this isn’t where I have run too this is where I choose to be, I am good at it and I will thrive here, this is for me. 
I am excited for moving forward now and I can enjoy this journey whilst I still pave the way to achieving my goals, now that I have accepted it, now that I have control over it and now that I own it. 

Posted in Personal development

Who do I compare myself too? 

I read this question in one of those get to know yourself Pinterest questionnaires and it got me thinking, I do have one person who I compare many areas of my life too,  right or wrong I definitely have noticed that I consistently do it. 

My friend Sara is strong, she is persistent, focused, motivated (and motivating) beautiful, fun, sincere and supportive,  I find myself on many occasions looking to her behaviour and routines when judging my own.  

When I’m sulking and feeling sorry for myself I remind myself what she is living through and how she handles it with grace and gratitude,  when I’m struggling to get up and work out she is my consistent source of motivation,  we have been pacing each other for so long I know I let her down when I get slack. 

When I need someone to trust and confide in she is always ready to listen and pull me up or give me advise or just hear me.  

When I think about the kind of person, friend, leader I want to be it’s Sara who is the image of what I aim to be. 

I fall short in every aspect but that’s ok it gives me room for improvement and someone I want to aim to be more like.  I know you should just aim to be a better version of yourself but if I can be a little more like the person I look up to then I’ll be just that. 

Thanks beautiful lady for your daily inspiration. 

Posted in Personal development

My weekend realisation 

I have been a bit moody lately and I think being tired and run down has allowed me to loose focus on what matters and wallow in self pity. 🙄

 I am just at the end of 3 days off, I spent them studying, working out, meal prepping and cleaning house, but I also took some me time, sat out in the sunshine, went for a walk, watched a movie and had a coffee date with my husband, slept in a little and took a couple of nice long baths. 
 I feel refreshed, rejuvenated and refocused.  I have reset my goals, set myself some realistic short term achievements to go after and reset me.  

I am feeling pretty good and almost excited to get on with tomorrow. I have a plan to stop me sliding down that slippery slope again,  and a clear mind to start fresh. 

I have found my big rocks,  the things that matter to me, that will keep my on my path. 

I am excited, motivated and happy.  

I think I am me again.  

Posted in Stuff

When was the last time I tried something new 

I’m not sure if it is acceptable to include food,  but I’m going to because it was awesome!!! 

We went to a place Calle Mondaze just 10 min from home in Jimboomba and they have these amazing delicious so bad for you but so spectacular.. shakes.   

I had been following a friend on Facebook who posted a trip here and couldn’t stop thinking about it for days. So Paul and I went to try them out after a massive study day,  it was a nice afternoon date doing something a little different.  

They really are very special, mine was a peanut butter and jelly shake and Paul had a coffee supreme.  I’ve seen plenty of pics of these super shakes but now I have finally tried one.  They are amazing experience. 

I won’t make them a habit but they are a spectacular treat. 

Posted in Personal development

Just thoughts and frustrations 

It’s been a crazy few weeks,  assessments for my bachelor degree have dominated all my free time and work has been just insane.  I have had no time to worry about health, eating right, exercising or even getting sleep, things that matter to me have just gone right out the window.  It’s funny how easily we can just drop what is important to us long term for what seems so important right now.

  I have lost my calm and my focus and everything just feels like I’m spinning, just hoping for something to grab hold of to steady myself and redirect my focus.  

The crazy feeling hasn’t been helped by the recent weather events here in Queensland,  nothing has impacted myself, family or friends really directly but the aftermath is quite intense. Work has been crazy since the cyclone crossed the coast and today is quite seriously the first day of normality.  I know what those seriously affected are going through, I was there in the last floods it’s just horrific and the devastation to lives, homes and businesses just keeps coming at the moment.  For a company so big we fell quite hard in all this and rebuilding might take a week or so but customer confidence has plummeted, when you can’t provide people with the basics in their time of need it is not easily forgiven.  My sisters town is the last to receive the brunt of it now with their river peaking yesterday it’s quite devastating thinking all they could do was wait for the inevitable.

Rocky race track 

I am reassessing my choices and decisions and evaluating my options, trying to work through what is right for me.  I need to stop the madness at work,  I need to stop letting others manipulate what I know and get back to me! 

Its time to stop and breath, then It’s time to start moving forward again! 

Clear the mind, find the big rocks and stop sweating the small stuff.. 

I keep getting caught in the sand.